Humiliation

Master has ordered me to post something. i have really been rather unfocused lately and it shows. i have only posted twice this month....definitely not good.

Humiliation has never been a strong point of mine. It really depends on my mood as to how graceful i accept it.

i have the word "slut" carved into my belly at the moment. It has been there for awhile now.....can't remember the exact date. The cutting itself has healed but it is still quite noticable.

It's odd having something carved into your skin. It's not a pen or marker that can be washed off. It is there...in plain sight....for the duration of the healing time, which could be months.

i have to be aware that it is there. i tend to not think about getting undressed or trying on clothes with family or friends around and i wouldn't want them to see it. i always hope i really don't need to make a dr's appointment when i have a visible cutting. i really don't know how i would explain it.

Even when i see it when i am out or at work, a shiver goes through me as i realize that i have no control over it.

It's easier to get away with explaining bruises than it is to explain why i have the word slut cut into my belly...lol.

But it is a stark reminder of my place and who is in control. It is Master's choice...not mine. i am His property.